Well… let me be honest.

The Oscar should go to ME!

Let me explain why. Every SINGLE day since I was age 4, I have used every bath/shower to perfect my Oscar speech. I have written {mentally} written over 8,000 Oscar speeches and perfect them to include: my shocked look when I actually win, tears, the wiping of said tears, the shakiness in my voice, and the {not so} authenticity in my voice as I accept my much coveted award.

The way I see it… I deserve an Oscar or at LEAST a shot at being a speech writer to the stars.


The Oscar’s are MY superbowl… therefore get ready for many, MANY Oscar posts!!

For now,