Isn’t that terrible? The day of love????

Don’t get me wrong… I love LOVE. I love so many people and I love few deeply… but I DO love. I love Jesus, my husband and my daughter with my WHOLE heart. I couldn’t love them more!

BUT… I hate Valentine’s Day.

Get your fiddles out and start playing me a sad song… because here it goes…

meh

As a kid, my parents chose to make examples out of me and my sisters. {I love my parents dearly. This is not a slam at them at all, but these stories are all part of my hatred of V-day} They did not believe in ordering balloons or flowers (I don’t even think that’s a “thing” anymore)  and having them sent to school. They told us that there are so many kids whose parents CAN’T afford to do that and they wanted to set an example of a parent that could, but chose not to. In their defense (though I didn’t get it at the time), I respect their stance on this. Honestly! But the 7 year old in me just didn’t understand.

A few years stand out– one year my dad felt really bad for me. I don’t remember all the details (I was so young) but my dad decided to order me and my sisters 1 balloon each and have it sent to school. School is over and yet another V-Day when I had to fight back tears and defend myself by saying “My parents think it’s not nice that some kids get left out” a million times over and I walk out to my dad’s truck. He seemed puzzled and kept asking if I had gotten anything. I was confused. He was the one that took the stand NOT to send anything to school? What was he talking about?Dad made some calls and apparently one girl (who I remember well and shall remain nameless) had gotten my one balloon mixed in with her huge pile of balloons. She didn’t notice and neither did the school. I remember it was a heart shape with Garfield on it.

There were the Valentine’s Days when {As the secretary was calling everyone’s names over the intercom} that the lady would accidentally say “Hitt” instead of “Hill”. I was the Hitt and she was mistaken… she was talking about another girl whose last name was Hill. Have I made my point? I hate Valentine’s Day.

Then there was the V-day that  I knew something wasn’t right. {And if he or his wife are reading… you know I love y’all!!! lol! But … this is part of the reason I hate this day}. I had the same boyfriend for quite some time but this year our celebration was different. I remember he wanted us to stay in for dinner instead of going out and he was very weird when I got there. I remember opening my gifts and I knew instantly something wasn’t right. Sure they were things I had asked for at some point or another {What 17 year old doesn’t want a pink/purple lava lamp??} but it just seemed off. 5 days later he broke up with me and broke my heart. (Don’t worry- it’s mended now) In my mind through all of the haze and the pain I just KNEW that on V-Day things weren’t right. It seemed obligatory and I should have known…

I don’t remember many V-day’s during my first marriage. I think he knew I hated the holiday but I do recall celebrating a time or two. The most memorable V-Day we shared involved a dinner in which he did not attend and a present that wasn’t for me. Let me explain…  He had been in Hawaii for a few days to attend work conference but came home on Valentine’s Day. He was exhausted from the quick trip and the time change (don’t blame him–not now or then) and wanted to sleep. He knew I was cooking dinner and he had said my gifts were in the suitcase. I attempted to wake him up twice and realized that wasn’t going to happen. I went ahead and cooked my chicken fettuccini alfredo, sat the table, lit a candle, and got everything ready. I tried one more time to wake him up. He finally made it known he had ZERO interest in getting up. I called my sister and she came over and ate with me. We enjoyed a lovely candlelight dinner together on V-Day. I got bored after she left and the kitchen was cleaned up so I decided to go snooping for my present. I loved what I found! The dress was beautiful, the necklace was awesome, and all of a sudden I wasn’t livid with him. The next morning he asked why I had his mom and sister’s V-Day presents in the chair in my closet. And yes– this brings me back to “I hate Valentine’s Day”.

I won’t even give my husband a chance to give me a lovely V-Day. Isn’t that pitiful? I’m afraid I am too cynical sometimes. {Ya think?} I just hate the dang holiday. I celebrate it with my daughter because I don’t want her to hate the holiday too… so I try. See? That’s me trying.

There ya go. That’s why I hate Valentine’s Day.

For Now,

Roxy

 

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