The first step is always the hardest.


I wish I could tell you how this whole process began, but it happened so gradual and yet so sudden that I don’t even know how to explain it… but I will try.

Probably 2 years ago (I say probably because I have no concept of time) we began talking about adoption. We called and got papers sent to us from the state to look it over and talk about it. The papers came, we read through them, and they set on the counter for months. After a very candid conversation we decided it just wasn’t the time and it didn’t feel right. I have always thought it would be fun to adopt again yet I was completely content to have one child. After looking at these papers for months, I finally threw them out. It just wasn’t right.

Flash forward around a year (there I go again with my guessing) and a couple spoke at church about ways we could get involved with the children’s home here in Hot Springs. We grabbed the information at the end of service and looked it over. This was for having a child come to your home more or less like a “big brother” program. It would have been having the child come to cookouts and possibly spend a weekend in our home. We were both excited about it–yet we went no further.

But over the past 6 months or so, something began to change. We talked often about “when” and “if” we ever adopted a child. I pointed it out one time that my husband had said “when” and even he was shocked he had said those words. Something was churning and we weren’t sure what.

I have some Facebook friends who have recently adopted and one couple that is in the process of bringing their children home from the country they currently reside in. I have followed their story and shared each step with my husband. We have been excited to see their updates and follow their story. Why? I don’t know… I have adopted before so it’s not foreign to me but something just made me want to know more.

Sometime before Christmas (which means between November 1st and Christmas day because I put my tree up extremely too early), my husband walked in the room and said “Let’s do it. It feels right. I think we are supposed to do this.” I couldn’t have agreed more! So once again I got the papers sent to us only THIS time we filled out them out with excitement and mailed them back.

So far we have had the background check, finger prints and initial home visit completed. We are waiting to get signed up for our mandated classes. After those are completed there will be a final walk through the home and then we will be considered “open and waiting.”

Waiting. Here’s where prayer comes in. We are waiting as patiently as possible. (Which if you know me means… well, not so patiently) And what are we waiting for? WE HAVE NO IDEA!!! We have ZERO clue as to what our future looks like. We specified no age, race, or gender. So will I be welcoming a teeny tiny infant or a teenager? I can’t answer that. But God can. Sometimes I wish he could just shoot me a text with that info so that I could sleep more soundly!! But it doesn’t work that way.

This journey is going to teach us all SO much. Patience, faith and trust are at the top of my list for things I will continue to learn but HOPE is what I cling to.

One of my favorite hymns states “But I know who holds tomorrow, and I know He holds my hand.” I cling to that. I don’t know what will happen. I wish I had more to tell you. I know that YOU want the details too! I don’t know what this journey will look like, but I know that He paved the road and he will walk us down it.

Pray for us. Pray for this child.

Mark 11:24 “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”

Thank you for being a part of this journey,

Cara Roxanne